Wednesday, 3 April 2013

Wives Who Cheat

Back in the days, it was always stories of men who cheat on their wives but these days, its like the women have put their foot down, lol, they are not having it anymore, either that or they just don't care anymore cos there are a lot of stories about women who now cheat on their husbands. 

I was at a client’s office sometime last week and her friend was there. Both women are happily married with kids and are quite successful business wise. I enjoyed every bit of my conversation with them. I got engrossed in my phone at some point cos I had another client who was on air and I was busy tweeting so that people would tune into the radio station and listen to him. I raised my head when I heard her friend say 'if you must cheat at least leave the man and let's know you are single', me wanting to hear gist, I just started with 'who what where, cheating, who's cheating' Lol. Apparently they know of a woman who is cheating on her husband and from what I gathered the woman isn't happy due to one thing or the other and they (my client and her friend) are of the opinion that as a married woman, instead of cheating, why not leave your husband.

This isn't the first I'm hearing of women who cheat on their husbands. I heard about a friend... well I wouldn't call her a friend, I guess I can call her an acquaintance. Now this acquaintance is married with a kid, she's been married before I met her about 3 years ago. I heard sometime early this month of how she cheats on her husband and has actually cheated on him with 2 guys I know pretty well. Imagine the shock when I heard.  Now I am not one to judge people, no matter what I hear or witness them do because I know it could be me in that position. I have no idea what the husband looks like and like i said, the wife isn't exactly a close friend so i have no idea what goes on in their home or why she cheats on her husband, i just wonder why she's cheating, what's missing in her life? what does she want? There are a millions answers to this question Why. Her husband might be mean to her, maybe he has stopped sleeping with her or he's a sorry ass lover and doesn't know how to give it to his wife well in bed. It could be that he's a rough lover and is into S&M, dominating her and she doesn't like any of that. There's the weakness factor that can make her fall for any guy due to lack of attention from her husband or maybe the husband doesn't know how to please her anymore due to fact that he puts his work first, he could also just be selfish or he just doesn't find her attractive anymore. The list goes on and this applies to every married woman out there. I pray not to find myself in a situation where I'd consider cheating on my husband in future. I'm human and I know any possible thing can happen so all I can do is pray.

Couples need to know how to keep their spouses satisfied, especially in the bedroom area. Husbands don't abandon your wives after a few kids and source for younger and fresher/tighter virginas outside your matrimonial home, your wife gets hornier after 40 so she needs that sex regularly and you should be available to give it to her. Wives listen well and listen good, the fact that you are now married doesn't give you the right to look old and haggard, do not put on stupid weight or decide to dress anyhow coz that is what makes you unattractive. Watch your diet, get your workout game on, be more fashionable and learn how to do more than the missionary style in bed with your husband. Be fit so that at 40 he can still flip you any way he wants to in bed. It can be done so get to it. Now guys, no woman wants a man who can't go rounds in bed, or just lays there waiting for her to do all the work. Please be healthy and fit, get your fashion game on, every woman loves a man who looks and smells good. I will also add that date night is very important for married couples, especially when you have kids. You may say 'Lowla you are not married so what do you know, you are just talking'. Yes you're right, I'm not married but I am not just talking, I learn from peoples experiences, I have married friends and a lot of male friends, I not only hear them talk but I listen to how they advice me as well. Even my parents tell me 'you better know how to cook and be good in the bedroom coz only that type of woman can keep a man, apart from if the man has 'ojukokoro''... I must add that a lot of men these days have 'ojukokoro'. Lol

Imagine what would happen if you're caught cheating on your husband? The embarrassment you will face and then family members from both yours and your husband’s side making an example of you. The worst is if you're thrown out of your husband’s house and deprived from visiting your kids. There's quite a lot to consider here. If you're not happy in your marriage, get counselling, speak to your husband because communication is very important, try and work it out, ask God to come in and turn it around for the better. Do everything you possibly can to save your marriage but if all fails and you remain unhappy then my advice will be to leave, be free so that you can not only sleep with whoever you want to but you can also be happy. Bear in mind that cheating on your husband is far worse than walking out of an unhealthy/unhappy marriage. Remember, you took your vows in the presence of God.

Love Lowla


  1. ..Emmm...keep on Mz. Adamson..doing good. I see someone taught you plenty English..wink..!!

  2. Fact keep it up girl right am right bck at yur

  3. I agree with much of what you say however, you make it sound easy to leave. I am married, have never cheated on my husband but I know wives who have and those who have been tempted but are unable to leave the marriage because of their husband. If he controls the purse strings then they struggle to leave, alternatively if they try to leave some men cause major problems and the wife ends up going back. No one knows the struggle and emotional trauma one faces until they are in that situation and being openminded rather than judgemental is how others should be. Marriages break down for a range of reasons. Being married is tough and requires much input from both parties although sometimes its hard to have a heart to heart conversation with a stubborn husband. I have no problem with either the husband or wife 'looking' at other people.....touching is a different matter and if a wife feels the need to touch then she should be surrounded by supportive friends who can be her shoulder of support in her time of need. As a wife there is always going to be times when you feel neglected but you don't need to turn to temptation from the devil. Have faith and you will overcome the problems.